Ben K

Travel update

Thu, 08 May 2008 19:45:14 GMT

Hey all -- I will be in Portland early next week. The trip is going to be mostly family obligations (my brother's graduation, visiting relatives), but if anyone in the area would like to meet up for coffee or something, Monday and Tuesday are still relatively free. I'd also be happy to get recommendations for good museums / shops / hikes / etc. Thanks!

the best news I've heard all week

Sun, 30 Mar 2008 00:27:28 GMT

So the other day I was listening to some Army of the Pharaohs (pent-up aggression, who me?) and did a double-take at the line:

"My peeps walk the streets with stolen heat like Prometheus"

Huh. Apparently I've stumbled into some bizarro mirror universe where not only is it hip to be square, but it is also pretty f***in gangsta to be a classics geek.

LADIES PLEASE, FORM AN ORDERLY LINE

weekend report

Sun, 23 Mar 2008 19:49:35 GMT

The moral of last night's play party: ye gods, people are dumb. X-acto blades are really not the right tool for a cutting scene (as a former morbid high school art student, I know whereof I speak). And wiping them down with alcohol and setting them on fire? Flashy != adequate sterilization technique, especially going from one bottom to another ::cringe:: Bonus points for, wait for it, blowing out the flame. Eeeuchh.

So yeah, witnessing that scene, plus more than the usual quota of risible domly posturing, meant that I was not really in a good mental place for any heavy play myself. But I got to hang out and chat with a bunch of folks whom I don't see enough of, so it was still a good evening.

In work news, I finished writing a basic user interface for the new translation stage. I realize this is kind of a ridiculous thing to get excited about, but driving the stage around at something like 30 cm/sec totally makes me feel like Ripley driving the robotic exoskeleton. Vreeee.... CHUNK!

cementing my identity as an honorary lesbian

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 01:51:26 GMT

So about a week ago, I did my first play cutting (on myself, for practice). The very next day, no shit, I received in the mail a cruise brochure from none other than Olivia (trademarked byline: "Where Lesbians Go".

...How did they *know*? I suspect spooky breast powers.

BTW,has anyone here tried moving the scalpel blade onto an x-acto handle? Did it help?

another day in paradise

Tue, 20 Nov 2007 01:11:39 GMT

So last night we went out to the Eagle and I had a few beers. Butch quotient... rising! I was, however, reminded of why a depressant like alcohol is a bad choice for self-medication for depression. Also, I've gotten ridiculed for my taste in clothing more often at the Eagle than at any other milieu I can think of since junior high. I can't detect any malice behind it, either... maybe this is the leathermen's equivalent of pulling on girls' pigtails?

Then, when I went into school today, I was greeted by an email from my labmate, regarding the laser we both use, and containing the following little gem:

"I tried to realign it only to make it much worse, sorry. and I can't seem to get the system realigned properly."

Lovely. So I'm off to have a look at that now.

Funny how it gets harder and harder to drag myself out of bed each morning.

A couple of amusing synchronicities

Sat, 10 Nov 2007 14:21:18 GMT

So the other day my advisor was in the middle of an espresso-fueled lecture on optical system design when he made some offhand reference to, of all things, the Opening of the Mouth ceremony. Naturally I followed up on this in conversation... turns out, he says, that one of the steps of mummy-preparation involved coating the mummy with a photopolymer resin, and then leaving it out in the sunlight to flood-cure? Weird. And then, the other night, on one of my too-rare forays outside my usual circuit of home-office-lab-home, I received a whirlwind lecture on Pythagorean number mysticism, not, as one might expect, from some tweed-and-leather-elbow-patches type, but a perky, baby-butch-looking hipster. Who knew? And she was accurate in every particular, up to the limits of my own knowledge.

(Confidential to chewie23: Not that I have anything against tweed and leather elbow patches. Especially on you. Rowr.)

So maybe the moral of the story is just that I have lots of delightfully bizarre people in my life. One more reason to get up each morning... and right now I need all of those I can get.

Current reading: the latest trade-paperback comic book from the public library is "The Five Fists of Science", Matt Fraction, writer, Steven Sanders, art. Features Nikola Tesla as a vigilante superhero; what more do you really need to know? I actually found the art a little disappointing -- not as delightfully retro as the writing. But recommended nevertheless.

victory condition: delicious biscotti

Sat, 27 Oct 2007 15:44:24 GMT

Yes, I finally got around to attempting biscotti (with dried cranberries and white chocolate), after having been somewhat intimidated by the intricate baking directions. Now I have an excuse to say 'biscotti' with the ostentatiously correct Italian pronunciation, thereby bringing myself one step closer to coffee-shop faux sophistication. Next steps: start saying 'the States' and 'the Continent' instead of 'the U.S.' and 'Europe'. And stop using 'cappucino' as a discrete noun, but instead ask for 'a cup of cappucino', a phrase which to me always seemed to suggest that cappucinos were not lovingly, individually crafted, but rather decanted from, perhaps, some huge vat of cappucino in the back room.

oops

Sat, 06 Oct 2007 15:48:49 GMT

I just realized that my online presence has been slim to none for the past month or so... My apologies for not keeping in touch with everyone. I have just been feeling really drained lately, both physically and energetically. Good news is that we are completely moved in to our lovely new place. There's a garden, with veggies and cooking herbs and grapevines. Next cooking project, filed under "copious free time", is stuffed grape leaves. I will be soliciting gardening advice from you all once spring rolls around. Also, it turns out that just a couple blocks away is an actual, official-like frisbee golf course. Would any of you local folks be interested in this?

update on life

Thu, 30 Aug 2007 22:07:07 GMT

So it turns out that an acquaintance of mine in the local leather scene has been operating under the assumption that my role in my primary relationship is 'boy'. You know, this would be mildly embarrassing... if this were the first time this misunderstanding had arisen. ::sigh:: Note to self: start telling people to fetch me beers and/or sammiches at every public opportunity.

Current (to me) comics reading: "Casanova", Matt Fraction, writer, Gabriel Ba, artist. Um... wow. Just, wow. Imagine a Jerry Cornelius story as written by Warren Ellis. If that sounds remotely appealing, then go read this.

Lab report: my argon laser is up and running. Almost 100 mW in the UV!

Turns out there was an ASCII command for this all along

Tue, 21 Aug 2007 17:04:24 GMT

An excerpt from a motion controller manual I'm reading right now...

"Command: 'x SS y' Description: Define master-slave relationship."

master's degree of puppets!

Sat, 11 Aug 2007 16:54:35 GMT

Not only have I fulfilled the requirements for a master's degree, I now have a research assistantship for the coming year! And the project in question involves lots of shiny toys! I'm still kind of freaking out about how to juggle my academic obligations here and the need to move back to San Diego... but at least for right now I'm getting financial support to work on a cool project.

In unrelated ephemera, it turns out that spanakopitas aren't actually that hard to make. A little bit annoying, but not hard. Who knew?

media whoring, geek style

Sat, 23 Jun 2007 03:22:11 GMT

Local folks, take heed! I am back from Missouri.

That is all.

Current reading: the trade paperback of the comic "Desolation Jones", writer Warren Ellis, artist JH Williams III. I thought Williams did beautiful work in "Promethea", but this is just... breathtaking. And the tone of the writing really suits my taste -- surreal without being silly. All in all, just the fix I needed while waiting for "Planetary" issue 27.

Current viewing: "Daywatch", the older Russian import version. Delicious atmosphere, very sexy, plus history-geek points for the Tamerlane references. Now if I could just figure out what the hell is going on... Maybe this is because of the charmingly mistranslated subtitles I had, or maybe because so much stuff from the novels didn't make it into the movies (as the Video Station clerk explained at great length), but I really had trouble with the plot. Was anyone else able to keep track of the various and sundry chosen ones and ancient artifacts?

Current listening: the Cradle of Filth cover of Sisters of Mercy's "No Time to Cry". Too much metal for one hand.

ephemera

Sun, 03 Jun 2007 18:20:49 GMT

From the department of next-best-thing-to-On-Our-Backs: The cover of the latest issue of the music magazine NME features none other than Beth Ditto, posing nude. You're welcome.

Link to a blurb at NME, not worksafe

Weekend report

Mon, 21 May 2007 01:03:48 GMT

Last night was a play party, with a roleplaying theme. I won't post a play-by-play since someone else has already done so; suffice to say that costumes were involved. A LOT of costumes. All three of the other folks I was playing with were theater geeks, and I definitely felt like I was struggling to keep up with their mad improv skillz. Anyway, I had a lot of fun, although I've still got a lingering feeling of restlessness and being not quite sated. I thought that, as you gained experience in leather, you were supposed to get a clearer sense of what kind of scene satisfies and fulfills you, but some days I feel like I'm just getting more and more lost.

The crowd last night was typical for this venue: almost entirely older hetero male-dom couples. I've been trying to put my finger on why I find it so hard to be around this sort of person socially... I think it has to do with the fact that they are still very much closeted, and so when they do get to socialize in a kink-friendly space, there's lots of nervous tittering about how very naughty everyone is. I think a big reason that most of my friends have moved past this is that they've been through the coming-out process, repeatedly -- even if not as kinky, then as gay or bi or poly or gender-variant or all of the above. That really does seem to give people a more grounded quality.

In related news, the Boulder Valley school district recently added "gender identity and gender expression" to its list of protected categories against discrimination. Go Boulder!

In almost entirely unrelated news, I now have a real genuine wok, courtesy of the thrift store. It is can be stir fry time now plz?

Book review

Sat, 19 May 2007 06:39:22 GMT

"Protocol Handbook for the Leather Slave: Theory and Practice" by Robert J. Rubel, PhD, and the fact that he makes a point of including the "PhD" here tells you just about everything you need to know about his personality. One typical section covers high-protocol dinner parties. Dr. Rubel starts off by suggesting that you copy this section verbatim into an "orientation memo that you include in dinner invitations to guests". What information will this memo include? There are a couple of nice forewarnings, e.g. that his slaves are expected not to make conversation while they are serving food. But the bulk of the memo is instructions like, and I quote, "Cut only one piece of food before eating it" and "Under no circumstances do you place the linen napkin on the dirty plate."

Let's all just take a moment to let this sink in, shall we? Dr. Rubel is proposing that we should invite some friends to dinner, but include in our invitations a primer on table manners. Because that doesn't reek of condescension at all. Arrgh.

Moving on... In actual life news, I got my grades for the semester back. Wow. I am honestly baffled at why I keep getting decent grades for crap work.

victory through lowered expectations!

Thu, 10 May 2007 23:17:21 GMT

Well, I actually made it through the semester. I did a pretty half-assed job, but right now just getting through everything without breaking down feels like a victory. In other news:

--Yay farmers' market! Yay fresh exotic mushrooms!

-- Go read Holly Black's new young-adult novel "Ironside". The best fantasy I've read in a looong time. Also, at various points the protagonists visit a fetish shop, quote Buffy, and make Vampire LARP in-jokes. The only problem is that now I totally want to go play Changeling.

-- Went to the thrift store today and found a pair of white leather pants. Now I just need to find something, anything, that goes with them. And, um, some occasion to wear them. The old lady shopping next to me noticed them... and promptly brought over a couple of other women's leather pants she thought might fit me. Awesome.

France... why is it always France?

Sun, 15 Apr 2007 17:01:06 GMT

A piece of free advice to some guy from last night: you will probably have more luck convincing people that your 'house of domination' in exotic Nebraska traces its lineage back through a Parisian domme if you stop pronouncing it 'dom-may'. Just a thought.

In other news, the local farmers' market is open again! Consequently, dinner last night was pizza, with fresh basil, a variety of fresh mushrooms, and goat cheese. I could get used to this.

what's new in the world of science

Sat, 14 Apr 2007 17:18:38 GMT

So the current project in the undergrad lab is using a laser beam to transmit an audio signal. The students do this by, no shit, sticking a razor blade onto the membrane of a regular speaker and putting this in the path of the laser beam. So as the speaker vibrates back and forth, the razor blocks more or less of the beam. At the other end the light gets measured and an audio signal is reconstructed from this. Pretty sexy... but it gets better. I quote from a student's lab book: "We found that this system worked better at lower frequencies. Therefore the audio signal we chose to transmit was a Barry White song." Niiice.

a brief devotional poem

Sun, 08 Apr 2007 14:59:59 GMT

Hail, thou maiden of the wild places,
Resplendent in the purity of Your will,
Your resolve flawless as the thunder-stroke.
As you deigned to aid me, so stoop once more
To hear my thanks and praise --
Votum solvit libens laetus merito.

movie review

Mon, 26 Mar 2007 16:29:45 GMT

Even though I'm not feeling super perky right now, I know that I have a lot to be grateful for. Such as my dearest, who not only considered '300' to be a date movie, but also filled in the gaps in my historical knowledge of the period, off the top of her head. In summary and in conclusion: I win.

So yes, '300' was a blast. We got to cheer at fondly-remembered lines ('fighting in the shade', 'traveler, tell Sparta', etc) even if the other moviegoers looked at us a bit askance. I'm not a huge Frank Miller fan, but his style is really effective here... the cinematography really captures the whole 'dramatically framed chiaroscuro' thing faithfully. I was expecting just a macho action movie, so I was pleasantly suprised to find a conception of Spartan virtue that was not the exclusive domain of soldiers and that emphasized the cultivation of one's reason. I read a review that complained about the movie's 'fetishization of the male form' to which I can only reply ABSOLUTELY TRUE A++ WOULD BUY AGAIN. Thanks to rain for recommending this to us.

Fri, 23 Mar 2007 16:46:26 GMT

I earned back some sorely-needed butch points the other day -- I got to use the machine shop! To, you know, machine things! For the rest of the day I was smelling grease on my hands and thinking, "yeah, I'd do me." Unfortunately today I'm only epoxying things together, which isn't nearly as hot (that one wood-glue-themed photo spread in Instigator notwithstanding).

Then I promptly lost said butch points last night, when we spent the evening with some dear friends, testing out various recipes for our equinox celebration tonight. We were trying to decide between barley cakes with honey, fresh-baked honey bread, and fried honey-and-Riesling cakes, and so we MADE ALL THREE. Because that's just how we roll! Sooo looking forward to the sugar high tonight.

gimme that old time religion

Tue, 20 Mar 2007 16:48:54 GMT

So I'd been hoping I'd have an opportunity to celebrate the Dies Sanguinis by making a blood-offering to the Magna Mater... boy, did I ever. I went to a play party this weekend with my dearest and a couple of good friends, and got to bottom in a genital piercing scene...

The top, my dearest, started off with a dozen or so easy piercings, moving up the scrotum and the underside of the shaft like the rungs of a ladder. (25 and 23 gauge, if anyone's keeping score.) Then she ran a pair of 21's in through the urethral opening and out the underside of the head. It was at this point that there started to be rather a lot of blood... the fact that I was rock hard probably didn't help. She let me catch my breath for a few minutes, then did a final pair of 21's on the surface of the head.

The actual pain wasn't as bad as I was expecting, but the head trip was pretty intense. Normally in piercing scenes I have a hard time feeling really connected to my top, because the top needs a lot of detached concentration. And so my own headspace tends to be very inward-turning. But this time I felt really attuned to my top, submissive to her, turned on to her. What an amazing experience. I'm so grateful: to her, to our friends who really helped to create a supportive space for the scene, and to the Goddess... Hail to the Dark Mother of the Midnight Flame!

More to write about when/if I have time, including a fetish event with lots of eye candy and a brief but hawt scene.

just biting my tongue

Mon, 19 Mar 2007 17:07:39 GMT

So my advisor is complaining that I'm not moving quickly enough on my research project, which, while undeniably true, strikes me as a bit unhelpful. I'd prefer some indication of what other project I should do in an even more half-assed fashion than I already am, in order to create more time for this one. Perhaps one of the two classes I'm taking, or the class I'm TA'ing? I'm already spending just about as little time on each of these as I feel I can get away with. Arrgh.

In honor of pi day

Wed, 14 Mar 2007 19:56:06 GMT

I try not to post links to Dinosaur Comics because they make me look, by comparison, completely devoid of wit, but I'll make an exception for today's.

upcoming events

Tue, 13 Mar 2007 21:27:55 GMT

Denver folks, don't forget that the "Bombshell Spirituality" lecture is tomorrow morning! It promises to be highly interesting. And then there's a fetish event this Sunday (www.kinkanevent.com) for which I'll be volunteering. I really don't know the details, but there are certainly some big names on the bill.

By happy coincidence, these dates also correspond pretty well with an ancient Roman festival in honor of the Magna Mater, a goddess who has strong associations with leatherfolk and the genderqueer. She was served by priestesses whom we'd recognize as transgender; her rites included flagellation and blood-play... even her epithet "turret-crowned" immediately reminds us moderns of Stonewall.

I'll let you all know how everything goes!